郁闷的奶酪(英语学习50年精选.百象管窥)

alever YOU Do,
Don't Reaal This!
     I remember a poster I once saw while standing on a railway platform
in Britain. The poster showed a multiple sclerosis patient in a wheelchair.
The text read: "You can walk away from this poster. He can't." That
clever statement creates a real dilemma2. By walking away (as everyone
eventually would), the reader confirms the truth of the message.
      Dilemmas like these, from which we cannot escape, are called
"double binds3''. Social psychologist Gregory Bateson, who invented the
term. used double-bind theory to explain and also to treat a number of
psychological disorders.
      Here's an example. A worried mother asked the great psychotherapist
 Milton Erickson to treat her eight-year-old son, who was still sucking his
 thumb. Erickson explained to the boy that thumb-sucking was perfectly
 OK. He should continue doing it. But not only that: the boy should suck
 all his fingers. This unexpected permission placed the boy in a double
 bind from which he could not escape. He could either accept a higher
 我记得曾经在英国看到过一张海报，当时我正站在火车站月台
上。海报上是一位坐着轮椅的多发性硬化症患者。上面这样写道：
“你可以从这张海报旁走开。而他却不能。”这一巧妙的陈述给人们
制造了一个真正的两难境地。读到的人一旦走开(而每个人*终都
会这么做的)，刚好就证实了该信息的真实性。
    像这样人们无法逃脱的两难处境叫做“(进退两难的)双重约
束”。这一术语是社会心理学家格雷戈里·贝特森创造的，他运用双
重约束理论来解释并治疗了大量的心理障碍。
    这里有一个例子。一位焦虑的母亲邀请著名的精神治疗专家弥
尔顿·埃里克森治疗她八岁的儿子，这孩子到现在还在吮吸自己的
大拇指。埃里克森告诉男孩儿，吮吸大拇指完全没什么错儿，他应
该继续这么做下去，而且不仅如此，他还应该吮吸自己所有的手指
头。这个意想不到的许可把男孩儿置于一个他无从逃脱的双重约束
 authority or give up his habit. After sucking his fingers for a few more
weeks, he stopped completely.
      Double binds are also used in politics. Just about 82 years ago,
most women in Turkey wore veils. Turkey's revolutionary leader, Kemal
Atatiirk4, quickly put an end to this practice. He issued an edict which said
that "prostitutes must wear veils". This placed Turkish women in a double
bind. By wearing veils, they would be affiliating themselves with a
highly questionable group; but by showing their faces, they'd be giving
up a centuries-old tradition--which they eventually did.
     I once gave a talk at the British Council on double binds in language
teaching. I gave it the title "Don't Come to This Workshop!" So many
people registered that I had to hold the seminar twice.
     This also suggests a clever way to avoid conflict. Next time you
need to give bad news to someone, say something like this first: "Bob,
I expect you to be rather angry when I tell you this; but anyway..." Your
partner is placed in the double bind of either being angry, which you said
would happen ("See, I told you so!"), or not being angry and allowing
you to have influenced his reaction. Try it. You'll be surprised how often
it works.
     Here's a wonderful party trick involving a double bind. All you need
is a box of matches, a 100 euro banknote, and an unsuspecting friend.
Show the box and the money to your friend and explain that he can win
100 euros by answering "matches" to every question you ask. Should he
hesitate, or say any other word, he loses. Ask him if he understands. If he
says "yes", you say, "You lost. You should have said 'matches'." You're a
nice person, so you give him a second chance. Here's how it goes: